Courageous to the very end, on January 24th, 2020, Cyn Howe died after a long battle with multiple lung diseases. Cyn wrote her own epitaph poem.

Remember Me

Remember me

In every flower, shrub or tree

Don’t lay flowers for me

Happily spread wildflower seeds

Geraniums, roses and poppies

And everywhere you will look and see

A better monument by far to me

Than flowers picked, cut, dried and died

Rather leave my legacy by the wayside

Wherever, whenever you pass by

Don’t sigh and please don’t cry

Make my life worthwhile

Please do it in this style

And help me help the wildlife

When I am no longer able

And if you feel sad remembering me

Plant an acorn, grow a tree

By Cyn Howe
March, 2002

A New Garden For The New Year!

It is mid-afternoon, we awoke to a wet, dull and overcast day, at last the rain has ceased, the darker clouds have fled and although the sun is not shining at least the clouds are lighter and the day brighter.

For some time now the garden has taken backstage in our lives, it has become so overgrown Mike has felt overwhelmed and consequently defeated by it. Over the years it slowly turned into a small nature reserve and our own wonderful piece of paradise, which we have delighted in sharing with all wildlife who wanted to live here or just spend time using it.

Some of the trees were so old and had grown so large --- silver birch, acacia and flowering cherry --- that they had become a concern because they were dropping large branches. The tops of the trees had huge 10 -20 feet branches fallen but caught in the canopy. With the high winds we are now experiencing we decided to have these removed, an agonizing decision, that brought tears and feelings of frustration. No doubt many of you will over the years have read blogs featuring the beloved birch tree, from the bare ice covered branches, lit by bright sunlight and with a clear blue sky behind, to the tiny new brown early stage catkins. The beauty of the tree in full catkin on a fine spring morning, the elegant look while it was in full leaf and the whole a golden yellow beacon shining out and lifting our hearts on a sunny autumn day. The birds, insects and squirrels also loved it, we could often see flocks of long tailed tits flitting about in it, as well as goldcrests, the squirrels often used to sit waiting for breakfast, watching from the branches to see when we were up and about, so they could come and bang with their tiny hands on the side kitchen window to attract our attention.

Shrubs have (to my mind) been decimated, many cut to ground level and two beautiful acers have disappeared altogether. I feared for the wildlife especially the birds in this cold weather, because so much shelter has gone. However I have to be philosophical about it, more work was needed than I could presently manage and perhaps the bare branched acers were not recognisable to the "landscapers"! All new spring growth has been trodden heavily underfoot, daffodils, aconites, snowdrops, primulas and much more. Life is a big learning curve, from this I have learnt that not everything is within one's control, being so breathless I was unable to keep a close eye on things, and I take comfort from the fact that even the down trodden plants and bulbs will given time return.

The upside of this is that Mike is so pleased, he now feels the garden is more in his control than for a long time, and that to me is joyful.

We would like in time to replace the birch with one that doesn't belong in a forest, we will also have the delightful task of researching and choosing two more trees. These will be chosen very carefully with size and attractiveness to wildlife, the most important features.

I expected not to see so much wildlife in the garden today, however, there has been as much as ever, the green woodpecker continues to spend most of the day here, our lawn obviously contains a full larder hidden underneath. Long tailed tits, blue tits, great tits, many blackbirds, pair of song thrushes, robins and wrens have spent the day gleaning for insects, spiders etc. which has been very heartening.

We have wondered where the foxes live, but have been unable discover the place, however all is now revealed; the workmen watched them running from the compost area when they were using their chainsaws nearby. I really hope they return..

Hopefully on the Road to Recovery and a Green Woodpecker

Happy New Year

It is Sunday 17th January, it has been such a long time and a hard struggle, often I have thought of my nature notes and been too weak and felt too ill to sit and do them. I first went into hospital on the 4th of July and finally returned home on the 12th of November. However now I have put weight on, my mind is more together and life and I are once again in harmony. Hospital was a long and arduous struggle which continued for more than four months, but once again I have to thank the wonderful staff at Papworth Hospital, from the lung defence team, through Mr Coonar my amazing surgeon, to the great oncology team, I owe all of them so much. Physically I am in poor shape, my lungs are worse than I have ever known them, and the extreme breathlessness has been and and at times still is hard to contend with. I must pay tribute also the amazing care and attention given to me by the physiotherapists, even now in times of extreme breathlessness I hear them in my head gently helping me through. This also applies to the nurses and all the other ward staff, who were so supportive and helpful. I am humbled by them all and so very grateful to each and every one.

This morning I awoke to a wonderfully bright morning, drawing back the curtains Mike said, "You are going to love this, it has snowed", he was right I did love it. My first thought was for the wildlife and while Mike sorted out our breakfasts, I managed to put out the bird and animal food, this was only the third time I have been able to do this and it gave me a great if very breathless lift. Lunchtime came and with it the last of the snow faded, however I can still picture the white covering over the grass and plants and resting along the tops of the tree branches.

My constant companion since returning home has been the daily visits of a female green woodpecker, each day Mike would come in and among other snippets would tell me how every morning while he had breakfasted and readied himself to visit me, he would always see the green woodpecker on the lawn.

Here I have to pay tribute to my husband a very special man in my life, despite being 77 years young, for all the time I was in hospital, each day he drove an 85 mile round trip, to spend several hours with me. We enjoy each others company so much and it was wonderful of him to spend so very much time with me.

Me and Mike in the gardens at Papworth Hospital

I also have to thank Mike for unceasingly feeding the wildlife daily and each evening the fox, despite the hour being so late and Mike so tired. So a big thank you to Mike from the wildlife the fox and me.

On finishing for today I would like to wish each and every one of you a very Happy and healthy New Year.

Papworth, Its Wonderful Grounds and Amazing Dr. Helen Barker

After a fortnight in Papworth, I am recharged. My lungs needed help and I was admitted for IV treatment, the consultant looking after me was Dr. Barker and on discharge it was the best I had felt in over a year. Imagine I could even lay on my back for a while and it is many years since I have been able to do that.

The kindness and the care I received were second to none, as each day passed I quickly realised that I could breathe more easily and felt stronger than for a long time. Chores such as filling the washing machine had become almost impossible, even emptying the laundry bin took several attempts and I needed a rest before I was able to fill the washing machine and this could only happen if I sat on the floor in front and loaded it. Taking rests between gathering the clothes from in front of me and feeding them into the machine.

Now, it is amazing I can easily fill the machine, such a small happening to be so pleased about, but I am --- and it is all thanks to Dr. Barker.

The grounds of Papworth are wonderful, they are full of majestic old trees, many different species all spread across these beautifully manicured lawns, there is also a duck pond where if one was so inclined one could tarry and while away a long time. However, there is a huge area to explore, quiet grassy walks between wooded areas, many of which were bluebell covered. One of these grassy walks leads to a very special area, it is a circular garden, having an entrance and exit opposite each other and is surrounded by hedges. As one enters there is a heart shaped rose garden and each side a round ring shaped garden, off to one side is a group of five white birch trees. There are seats all round the inner edge of the circular hedge bounding the garden, so there is always somewhere sheltered and peaceful to sit and watch the birds, blackbirds, robins, and pied wagtails being the most commonly seen. The whole of this garden is surrounded by woodland.

Me and my husband Mike in the grounds of Papworth Hospital

I was able to explore the grounds each day and go progressively further the more my lungs cleared. Walks were also taken with visitors and I was able to share my love of these grounds and the fine trees therein with many people, including some of my physiotherapists.

Also next to the grounds is a bluebell wood, it is spectacular and probably the finest bluebell wood I have ever visited, there are other wild flowers there and wonderful fungi, and luckily superb paths to walk and plenty of locals either taking their children or walking their dogs.

Rare Sighting of a Kestrel

Two or three weeks ago we heard a kestrel calling, the first for a very long time. Today we watched one hovering over head. Perhaps if we are lucky we will see more of them.

A while back we lost all of our small birds due to sparrowhawks, so these birds of prey are not always a good bird to see in gardens

From Hertfordshire to Papworth in Cambridgeshire

Spring is well and truly here. Fields are so green, hedges so dense and waysides full of bright yellow dandelions and cowslips. I am reminded of the 1940's and 1950's when cowslips grew everywhere and we picked great bunches of them to take home and fill vases -- something we would never do now, but always did then. The same with bluebells, we would go to the woods and come back with arms full, having been sternly warned always to pick them properly, never to pull them up, no white must be seen at the end of the stem or the plant would be ruined and never flower again.

We would also pick masses of primroses, these would be divided and packed carefully in shoe boxes to be sent near and far to friends and relatives, the last bunch being saved for the Doctor's wife and they would be taken by bus to a nearby town.

Picking wild flowers is frowned upon now, which shows how attitudes have changed with the passing years.However I digress and must return to my journey to Papworth.

We pass a brown leaved, white flowered Amelanchier standing out amid the fresh green of the surrounding trees and bushes, over which unruly brambles scramble and climb.

The sheer variety of greens is staggering, yellow greens, blue greens, brown green, mossy greens, some leaves that look almost white as they move in the breeze and right at the top of some trees are ivy leaves which look almost a black green. To think when I was a child I thought green was green, I remember many years ago hearing my father say there were many shades of white, and now years later I realise of course there are!

We pass verges with long stretches of white dead nettle and growing behind huge swathes of vivid yellow rape, both wonderful for insects.

Many wayside trees are starting to bloom, usually white and with no accompanying leaves yet, the trees look delicately pretty. We have just passed a very pretty pink and white blossomed apple tree, a heavier looking tree, it cannot be called delicate but it is beautiful. Grown no doubt from a core randomly thrown from a car window.

On a telegraph wire above a tangle of bushes I spy a tiny bird --- not a wren -- this one is the wrong shape and smaller, I think it is a goldcrest.

On the right hand side amongst all the greenery, there is a startling stretch of red leaved hedge, Photinia Red Robin, it is very attractive.

Just before Chipping, we are delighted to see a host of white and yellow narcissi brightening the verge. We keep passing odd small groups of blue flowers, I cannot recognise them at this speed, but I have a feeling they are a variety of hardy geraniums. Just before Reed we pass huge clumps of cowslips and narcissi on the wayside, these are a great addition to the countryside.England in spring is so beautiful.

Across the rising and falling fields there is a row of trees all the same size and shape the branches are bare and in their starkness they look very attractive. I love the sweep of the land here, it is made of gently rolling hills as far as the eye can see.

Lovely countryside and rolling hills along the A10

We are passing through Royston and the mature ornamental cherries marching down each side of the road in full bloom, are spectacular.

We pass a Catholic Church, a large sign outside warns us that this is 'Private Property', it seems a strange sign to have outside a church, where I thought all were welcome.

On the verge, just before a roundabout is a lone bright red aquilegia (grannies bonnet), it is flowering on what appears to be waste ground. May be in years to come seedlings will spread across and give an eye catching display.

This is the best time of year to see horse chestnuts, proudly holding their candles high and upright.  They can be seen in fields, by rivers and along roads all over the country and are so precious because they give of themselves three times. Firstly as sticky buds, they are interesting  to pick and put in a jar full of water and watch the sticky buds give way to those beautiful fresh green leaves . Secondly as these magnificent mighty trees flower they are spectacular, from a distance they look amazing with an abundance of candles standing upright on all the branches, and if you agree with this then try looking at a flower closely, you will be amazed at how intricate and beautiful they are up close. Thirdly they share their fruit with us in the autumn, they are known as conkers and I find them a perfect joy, their shape, shine, colour and patterning give me much pleasure.

There is a red flowered version of horse chestnut. Near where we live is a very long avenue of these red flowered horse chestnut trees and to drive between them when they are in full bloom is a wonderful experience.

We are passing the back entrance of Wimpole Hall, we have spent many happy hours here, lunching in their fine restaurant, walking the grounds and enjoying the unusual cattle, browsing the second-hand bookshop, visiting the farm and also occasionally going in to the house and last but not least buying plants.

Wimpole Hall

This time of year the young lambs are playing in the same fields as people wander. The lambs are leaping and gamboling and so much fun to watch, they fill me with joy and laughter and make the world a brighter place.

Lambs frolick in the grounds of Wimpole Hall

Further along on the left we pass a row of thatched cottages, they are reminiscent of old England.

Approaching Longstowe there are fields of bright yellow rape on both sides of the road, and across the fields to the right is a picturesque windmill another sign of old England.

Clusters of cowslips and stretches of dandelions fill the verges, here and there groups of tiny, white, flat to the ground daisies grow. On the left fluffy headed bullrushes grow from a ditch and nearby an equally fluffy headed palm tree looks wonderful.

It has been very heavily overcast and as we arrive at Papworth the clouds part and show small areas of clear blue sky, it seemed a portend to a happy day. How was I to know that in a very short while I would find out my cancer has regrown yet again. Once again the fight is on.

Devastating High Winds

The high winds of a few nights ago, not only caused sleeplessness with their loud roaring noise, but also damage to trees and plants. Our ancient five feet high magnolia stellata, with its pure white star like flowers lost its top. In the lane two more trees succumbed and were left uprooted and tossed across the lane, in falling they took with them our telephone line.

As frustrating as we found this, it must have been far worse for the pair of long-tailed tits, whose nest was wrested from the safety of its hedge and thrust to the ground by the strong wind. I had watched them for several days collecting materials for their nest. These ranged from wind blown feathers, moss gathered from the lawn, lichen from the old apple tree to tiny sticky cobwebs, which they collected from round the inner window frames while hovering. These were used to bind their beautiful little round nests together.

Looking from the lounge window I saw the pair of long-tailed tits flying to and fro in an agitated manner, when we went into the lane to check the telephone line, we found the two trees down blocking the lane and to my sadness we also found the freshly built long-tailed tits nest on the ground, next to the hedge.

Honey Bee

I have just seen the first honey bee of this year!

First Violets

I was pleased and surprised on glancing from the conservatory to see a clump of deepest blue violets in full flower. A walk round the garden proved there were several clumps growing in the bottom part of the garden and the lawn. They varied in size of clump also in colour from deep blue, down through all shades of purple, lavender, the palest mauve to purest white.

Last year I tried to clear the ones growing on the left hand bottom lawn, by digging them up,potting them and giving them away, however they are determined little plants and this year are back, sprinkled across the lower end of the bottom left hand lawn. We are having to rethink this lawn as it is covered in primulas and bluebells also, these are all self seeders and we might be tempted to not mow, instead just leave this lawn as a wild growing spot!